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A Blog is Born
The Wing Report (Please see 5/7/04 post first.)
Friday, May 7, 2004
Welcome to the WingReport
Mood:  on fire
Topic: A Blog is Born

Ah, the wonderful world of hot wings. I can't remember where or when I first sampled a 'Buffalo style' wing but I know it's been well over a decade. Over the years, I've had them in in the Deep South (Beaufort, SC) and the Great White North (Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada) and many points in between. I've had wings served up by national and regional chain restaurants like Ruby Tuesdays, Hooters, Eat'n Park and Kangaroo's as well as local offerings from mom and pop eateries and bars who only shake them once a week. I've sampled many different sauces: BBQ, ranch, butter garlic, Atomic Taz, hot, suicide, teryaki and Cajun and more that I can't recall. This afternoon, my oldest son, Josh, and I were trying out a local spot that was new to us when I realized that it could be a lot of fun to write up some reviews of wing joints and their offerings and post them on the Web. And thus another blog was born.

The Criteria

First things first: This is a wholly subjective, wholly unscientific undertaking and it's just for fun. The last thing in the world that anyone should do is take this seriously. I'll also say here and now that I'm not getting paid by anyone for doing this, nor am I getting free meals out of it. Now that I've got that off my chest, here's the simple set of criteria I'll use in rating any establishment's product:

    Wing Size - Bigger is definitely Better.

    Cost per Serving - Cheap is good; cheaper rules. I usually look for wings that are priced around $.25 each. If they cost more than $1, a significant amount of chicken, like the thigh or drumstick, had better be included in the deal.

    Taste - If they taste like cardboard rolled in sheep dip, I don't care how cheap they are. Unless they're free. I found out during my college years that free is always good no matter how bad it tastes.

    Ambiance - I've had lousy wings in places that just dripped ambiance and great wings in places where other things were dripping, so this isn't terribly important. Still, an excellent waitress or comfortable booth does add something to the whole experience and it makes the math a lot easier for me when we get to my point system, which, BTW, is coming up next.

The first three categories above will get a maximum of 3 points. The last gets one. A perfect wing experience will score 10. Here's the breakdown:
    10 - Don't ever go anywhere else; you'll just be disappointed. In fact, there's really no sense in ever eating anything again. Consider donating your body to science.

    9.9 to 7.5 - Good enough to come back to every time wings sound good.

    7.4 to 5.0 - Not the best, but a long way from the worst.

    4.9 to 3.5 - Getting a whole lot closer to the worst.

    3.4 to 2.0 - Well, if it's a choice between last week's cold tuna casserole and eating these wings, have a nice glass of water and go to bed.

    Below 2.0 - No, you're not imagining it: these wings really suck.

I tend to favor hot or suicide wings to any other flavor so most of the reviews you'll read here will probably concerned with them. In the interest of fair play, I'll occasionally try a different sauce, if I have any working taste buds left.

That's it! I'll include locations for each review and publish differing opinions if and when I feel like it. (Hint: Opinions expressed in language rude, obscene or poorly punctuated will slip quietly into the ether and merge with those electrons known only to God.)

bone appetite,

Posted by Pete at 12:34 AM EDT
Updated: Friday, May 7, 2004 8:43 AM EDT
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